Who knew that Hillary was such a ham?

We have to say, the former first lady is one of the funniest speakers The Buzz has heard in ages. And we mean intentionally funny, not unintentionally so, like some politicians.

U.S. Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton, D-N.Y., gave the opening address at last week’s “Women and Politics” seminar at Furman University’s Riley Institute.

She gave a shout-out to many of our state’s leaders, including U.S. Sen. Lindsey Graham, R-S.C. — the man who helped prosecute the impeachment of her husband, President Clinton.

Clinton and Graham are working together on legislation to improve health benefits for National Guard members.

She said she had told him she was coming to his home state.

“I told him that I would either praise or condemn him, whichever he wished,” she said.

We called Graham to ask which he’d prefer. Spokesman Kevin Bishop just laughed. “We may just let her comment stand on its own.”

Bishop did say that Graham and Clinton are on pretty jovial terms. They were in the Senate press gallery just after her autobiography came out. She asked him whether he was going to buy a copy.

“She said it’s only 30 bucks, you can spring for that,” Bishop said.

Graham demurred. “He told her he’d wait for the paperback.”

PALMETTO PRAISE

Clinton had high praise for former Education Secretary Dick Riley, the namesake of the Riley Institute and the rare Cabinet member to serve through two full terms.

“Secretary Riley gets an ‘A’ for effort, an ‘A’ for achievement and for surviving the entire eight years, an ‘A’ for attendance as well.”

She also praised U.S. Sen. Fritz Hollings, D-S.C., for his devotion to the issues he cared about, especially the mounting deficit. He talks about it when asked — and even when not.

STROM STORIES

But it was the late U.S. Sen. Strom Thurmond who prompted the warmest stories.

She said she had a collection of stories about Thurmond, dating from her first spring in the White House, when she was surprised by the senator’s calling on a Sunday.

He’d called to wish her a happy Mother’s Day.

Another Saturday morning, the phone rang at 7 a.m. Her husband took the call, and said, yessir, right away. When he got off the phone, “he said, Senator Thurmond wants to come up and show some people the Lincoln bedroom.”

Early this year, when she was sworn in, Thurmond gave her a special congratulation.

“As I was walking back to where I was assigned to sit, Senator Thurmond reached out his hand,” she said. “He just pulled me in and gave me the biggest bear hug you ever saw. It took a little while to get extricated.”

She adjusted her path thereafter.

“Every time I would go by his desk, I would position myself so that every time he stuck out his hand, the desk was between us.”

As a new senator, she said, she often has to take the desk and preside. “If Senator Thurmond was in his desk, he’d blow me kisses,” she said. Then from time to time, he’d call over a page.

“He’d root around in his desk and find some hard candy and send it up to me.”

KEEPING HIS EYE ON THE BALL

Mayor Bob Coble, who is running for the U.S. Senate next year, brought down the house at the Columbia City Council meeting last week.

After the council signed off on the plan to build a new hotel with USC, Charles B. Weasmer of 1019 Laurens Street interrupted the parade of hosannas being offered on all sides to offer a lone voice of dedicated opposition.

He said he was concerned that the National Advocacy Center, the training program for government attorneys nationwide — and part of the reason everyone says a hotel is needed — might leave once its long-term commitment to Columbia runs out.

“Quite possibly, a future senator will want it located in his home state,” Weasmer told the council.

Coble, not missing a beat, said, “Well, I certainly hope so.”

Y’ALL WENT WHERE?

U.S. Rep. Dick Gephardt of Missouri is having problems finding a toehold in South Carolina’s Democratic presidential primary, and maybe that’s because he doesn’t know where he’s putting his toe in the first place.

Gephardt was in the state this past week and, according to the news release from his campaign, visited Florence, Williamsburg, Jasper and Fairfield counties. It also said he was going to someplace called “Buford” County.

Now, there’s a town of Buford over in Georgia, but in these parts we have a “Beaufort” County, which apparently is where Gephardt visited.

Gephardt has been trailing U.S. Sen. John Edwards of North Carolina, retired Army Gen. Wesley Clark and U.S. Sen. Joe Lieberman of Connecticut in the polls here.

But Gephardt at least has precedent for the mistake. Back in 2000, President Clinton gave a speech to the Education Writers Association in Atlanta. According to the official White House transcript of the speech, Clinton said he had given an award to “Buford County Elementary in Buford, South Carolina.”

As we recall, Clinton never did too well in South Carolina, either. Which just proves, you gotta find the place before you can win it.